Stygian D

Diablo III.

doughthoughts:

YEAHHH MOTHA FUCKA. I’ll cop next week.

Rise and Shine

“the sun gonn’ shine, but the reign won’t stop.”

I’m writing again, and it’s easy. I’ve got ideas, flowing through me, and I know it’s working ‘cause I’m writing notes. I’m coming up with conversations in my head, and scenes are shaping properly. I just need some plot points, or decide on a message I’d like to write a story about. After all, that’s what my stories are for. They’re lessons, learned through drama and arguments. What I’m upset about is the fact that I can’t write my damn script for my videos. I really REALLY want to edit a video, but I have no idea what I want to look for. Yeah, it’s been a bit since I blogged, but I have so many drafts, I just don’t know which one to use when I want to write. 

The Fall.

“I ain’t scared of the fall, I’ve felt the ground before.”

It beckons to you. You can sit there in chaos, or sit there in silence. It will always call to you. Ringing in your ears. Reminding you that it will always be there. When everyone has left. When you realize that you can’t think. You can’t hear your own voice in your head. It bounces off the grooves in your brain. The cracks in your soul, echo it’s cries of despair. You wonder if this is what it’s like to die. The desperate breaths. You shake, hands and legs lose importance. Falling into Death’s embrace, can be peaceful. 

You can wake the fuck up. 

You can push adrenaline through your body. You can pump blood through your veins. You can take deep breaths. You can punch something. You can grab something. You can remind yourself that whatever is in front of you, is real. You can shout back. You can not care. You can fill grooves in your brain. You can fix the cracks in your soul. You realize that life isn’t as hard as people make it. When you can’t hear your own voice in your head, make it louder. Be brave. Remind yourself. You don’t make the right choices, you make choices that fit your needs. Be selfish.

At the end of the day, everyone else is too.

Don’t get lost in the music, sing along.

I think that if people ask me more questions, I’d blog more. It’s easier to answer people, and write about things that are specific, rather than have me sit here, and try to find something to talk about. Plus, I have a decent amount of followers now, so INBOX. :D

Anonymous asked: BLOG MOREEEEE

Will do. :)

Sorry, but this is necessary.

http://toronto.kijiji.ca/c-ViewAd?AdId=374326174&MessageId=MSG.VIEW_AD.EDIT_AD_SUCCESSFULMXAdIdMZ374326174MXGuidMZ136e617d-fab0-a20b-26b5-5571fffe7749&mpname=Activity-EditAd&mpuid=1700273%3B212%3B374326174%3B59963230%3B%3B

This is an Ad for an apartment I’m renting. Anyone in Toronto/Sauga/Scarborough should check it out. It’s a great deal, and a great area. Comes with appliances. I’d also ask my followers to reblog/post on Facebook. I’d like to get this rented ASAP.

housingplans asked: Hi Hi! I'd like to maybe use some of your stuff for my blog, hope that's OK.

I wouldn’t mind, as long as you credit me somewhere visible, ‘stygiand.tumblr.com’

Rolling Stone.

“Yeah I know I got my issues, why you think I fucking flow?”

As we packed up her things, I tickled her a few more times. To her anguish, she grabbed me and pulled me close. She kissed me and repeated “I don’t want to go home..” I reassured her by saying, “four months isn’t a long time, plus there are visits.” She smiled and continued to pack up her final items. As we brought them down, I encountered my friends discussing with her mother ‘How well of a guy I am for her’, to which I’m grateful that my friends answered honourably. On the way back from returning her key, before we turned the corner and walked out the doors to the public. She turned to me and hugged me tight. Tighter than we’ve ever hugged. We kissed, passionately, for the final time. I grabbed her hand and walked toward the doors.

We shared a silly moment as we both stumbled down the misleading steps, and towards the awaiting parents and friends. Her mom stated, “Well, it was nice meeting you guys, you’re free to come up and have a place to stay. She smiled as she turned away. “I guess you can say your final good-byes. When she said ‘final’ I sort of grimaced at the pain. I turned away and allowed Cody and Gino to say good-bye, offering awkward hugs for the first time of their friendships. They walked to the Jeep and left me standing there with her.

I pulled her close as she chuckled, “the rear-view mirror”. “I know, I want them to see us.” I kissed her, more of a romantic lingering one. Memory creating. I hugged her, and let her skip away to her vehicle. As I walked to the Jeep, I realized I didn’t say good-bye, all for the better as it were. I got in, and my friends asked if I was alright. I reminded them, that I always will be, and rolled up beside her truck. I beckoned to her Step-Dad, asking if they knew how to leave. He made a useless joke, but assuring enough for me to leave. Bri waved and I smiled, I noticed the roses I got her for the monthaversary, stuck in the front seat because of the large vase I gave her. I drove away, and turned my music up. Leaving what little emotion I had left to the voices in my head. 

Ever since she left, this scene has been replaying over in my head. Everytime I close my eyes. All of it, quickly, almost like a cinema roll. Of course I can’t stop thinking about her, but I really need to get out of this funk. I don’t let it show, and that’s all that matters. I thought I’d share it, and try and get a little writing done. 

“Confidence, Bri.”

The Wifey.

I think it’s safe to say that this is well over-due, but I believe it’ll keep me sane just a while longer. 

I’ll describe her, but if she ever reads this, forgive me if I miss some details. 

We started this relationship, awkwardly. Trying to get past the invisible barrier that we labeled as a friendship. I don’t actually remember, when or how exactly we got over the barrier, all I know is that I started by holding her hand. We hung out, and chilled. All day long. I got to bring her home a few times, and even then we still hadn’t kissed. We just slept, and that was at least a turning point for my Dad, since he allowed it. Yeah, I’m an adult, but at the end of the day, it’s more about comfort for everyone in this situation. 

Finally we dove right into the deep-end. I’ll skip the dirty details, for now. 

I like the way she walks, and I like her figure a lot. Not because she’s slim, or athletic, but because she doesn’t care about it. She eats whatever she prefers, and maybe she does pay attention to her body, if so, it doesn’t come up, ever. I like that I can fluster her. That’s a cute thing. I mean, she’s smart, very intelligent. I do believe that she’s smarter than me, a better writer truly, but I love to confuse her, and then just drop the conversation. I do that with a lot of people, just to see how they react, and they all fail. They get mad at me, and bothered by the fact that I confused them for no reason. Disappointing. 

Lastly, I like the way she is always thinking about something, and never wants to tell me. I know she is. I can tell. I see the gears in her head moving. Thinking. Day-dreaming. It’s not about trust. She doesn’t ask me what I’m thinking all the time, for the same reason I don’t. It might be personal. We’re both people who grew up as Loners. We need our Loner-time. Even when we’re together. 

Did I mention that she’s totally okay with me Gaming when she’s with me? Total plus. Her younger sister has a PS3, and plays some of the same games as me, so she’s used to it. I mean, we’re usually watching a movie, or playing games, or … other stuff. So yeah, time with her, goes by at a perfect pace. This isn’t enough of a description, I know. But it’s more about the things that I find special. 

There’s more, but I’m getting tired and I don’t feel like addressing everything at once. 

High Road.

“You can say what you want about me, keep talking while I’m walking away.”

I love the constant ring of a piano. There’s something about the hard hitting sounds, bass included. I also love violins, to the death. As long as someone can play it, I’m good with listening. 

Let’s try and keep this specific shall we?

Everyone talks shit, and if you don’t then you must be special. Talking shit can be assumed as Joking or Kidding Around, but there’s always some truth behind a joke, without it, there’s no relation, therefore you wouldn’t laugh if you didn’t understand it. If someone says “A dresses like Napoleon Dynamite” and B laughs, then C is talking shit about A. 

Pretty simple right? Now if you’re looking for advice in terms of how to not get shit talked. Don’t. Don’t worry about it. Talk is cheap. Compliments are expensive. Just move on and let them say what they want. If someone’s talking about you, then they’re thinking about you, and want someone else to think about you too. These days, if you’ve got attention, you can become quite the celebrity. 

Just remember, Fads go by weekly for this generation. If you want to last, you better start some trends, quickly. Be prepared for some back lash. 

Wet Paint and Bleach.

I have two apartments in my house. One is on the main floor, and is attached to the back of my house. The other is my basement. Let’s call them Apt.1 and Apt.2, just so it’s easier. 

Apt.1

• Painted
• Cleaned
• Patched
• New Appliances
• Floors are messed up. 
• Very spacious.

Apt.2

• Painted
• Patched
• Needs to be Cleaned
• Appliances are old
• Height limited to around 5’7

Now I’ve been working my ass off on these two apartments, for the goal to rent them before the end of the month. There’s been some drama, and this is long overdue. I just wish it wasn’t my money being spent, or my time, or my strength. I really do. I don’t think it’ll ever be paid back. I’ve spent about 800-1200 bucks on repairing and extra shit. 

Luckily I sent out some resume’s, so we’re hoping I’ll get a job to start refilling my ammo.

(Just trying to get my head sorted out. I’ve got some good writing churning in my head, so bear with me, followers.)

calm-y0tits asked: Hey IDK you but I don't need to, to know that you are beautiful don't let ANYONE ELLS tell you otherwise your worth it so don't tell yourself your not. And more important YOUR NOT ALONE :) I hope you have a great day !

Thank you. I don’t believe I’m ever alone, always accompanied by the voices in my head. I hope you have a great day, and continue to have them.